Published: 1st January 2023

The screening of John Lewis & Partners’ Christmas advert has become a modern addition to the yuletide season, like festive jumpers or an elf on the shelf.  This year’s offering came as something of a surprise. Set to Mike Geier’s archaic cover of Blink 182’s ‘All the Small Things’, it features a forty-something attempting to grasp the basics of skateboarding. His motives only become clear when a teenage girl called Ellie, armed with a skateboard, arrives at his home with her Supporting Social Worker and the penny drops: Ellie is a foster child. 

 The advert ends with a message about John Lewis’ commitment to the 108,000 young people in the care system in the UK. It is more than just words, with John Lewis having become an accredited fostering-friendly employer, giving more opportunities to young people who are care experienced.  

Here in Horsham, John Lewis has also formed close ties with the West Sussex County Council's Fostering Recruitment team, which has been keen to take advantage of the national publicity the advert has generated. Fostering West Sussex has updated its website to feature an image of Ellie, while also campaigning locally to highlight the need for foster carers. 

Nikki Burch, Senior Marketing and Communications Officer at WSCC’s Fostering Recruitment Hub, said: ‘One of the things we loved about the John Lewis advert is that Ellie Is an older child - 64% of the children we care for are aged 11 to 17. Ellie is a perfect example of someone who needs a safe and supportive home and someone who can guide them through this important and uncertain time in their lives. The advert also captures the incredible lengths that foster carers go to in order to make a child feel welcome.’ 

‘We urgently need to recruit foster carers who can provide safe and loving homes to the 850 children we care for. We know that the decision to become a foster carer is a big one, but I urge anyone who has thought about it to come and speak to us.’ 

POSITIVE EXPERIENCE 

Building on the advert’s momentum, WSCC's Fostering team held a pop-up event at John Lewis’ Horsham store on 3 December, with staff and several local carers chatting informally to customers about fostering and the difference it can make to young lives. Among the carers were Lucy Shepherd and her 10-year-old son, JJ. Lucy has three children, with two teenage daughters as well as JJ, and yet the Shepherds have fostered ten children over a seven-year period. 

Lucy said: ‘I always wanted to foster. As a child, I would read books about children with no place to live and it struck a chord that always stayed with me. My husband, David, didn’t have the same feeling, but he’s a wonderful dad and agreed that fostering was something we could do as a family. Our biggest concern was how it would impact our own children, but I can honestly say it has only been a positive experience.’ 

‘We have all made sacrifices, but the children have learned to have empathy, to share belongings, and how to communicate with young people from all walks of life. JJ was three when we started going through the process of fostering, so he can’t remember a life without having other children in our home. We have welcomed ten children, some for one night as emergency accommodation, others for several years. They have all brought challenges, but we've not had a single bad experience and it’s been hugely rewarding.’ 

‘Some of the children in our care have been refugees from countries like Eritrea and Iraq. Having children of our own has made a difference, as they’ve connected with refugees in ways we couldn't as adults. When there’s been a language barrier, they’ve used games and music, and the girls have played with each other's hair. I don't think we could have done it without them!’ 

‘We take great pride and happiness in helping someone build their own life and eventually move on. We miss them, but they’re seldom gone forever, as we are their family in the UK and celebrate Christmas and birthdays together. That’s especially the case with those who are no longer in contact with their birth family. We continue to foster children, always thinking about who will fit into our lives as our own children grow older, because it’s been an amazing experience and helped define who we are as a family.’ 

SUBSTANTIAL SUPPORT 

The pop-up stall at John Lewis also served as a reminder of the many different types of care, including respite or emergency care, kinship care (where a family member takes responsibility for looking after a child as an approved carer) and supported lodgings to help young people learn the skills to live independently. It also offered information about the training and support provided to those willing to help a child in need. This includes ongoing 24/7 professional support and a competitive financial package of up to £28,500 per year. 

Heidi Goodwin, of the WSCC Fostering Recruitment team, said: ‘Whilst all the children that we care for are in safe accommodation, with many already living with local foster carers, a significant number of children in West Sussex are still waiting to be found a foster family and there is a need for people to step forward.’ 

‘I think people often discount themselves as they don’t think they’ll qualify as a foster carer. Perhaps they think their house is too small, or that they don’t earn enough, or that they’re too old or too young, or have children of their own. Some may believe that we don’t take on single parent households, welcome same-sex 

couples or those practicing religion, but that couldn’t be further from the truth. We want our family of foster carers to be as diverse as the children we care for, with a range of backgrounds. That’s why it’s worth having a chat to find out what is possible, if fostering a child is something you’ve considered. It might transpire that it’s not the right time for you, but the support we offer is considerable. And it might well be the right time!’ 

EMPATHETIC TOUCH 

Another local couple helping to promote fostering at John Lewis was Graham and Sarah White. As well as raising five sons, giving them 12 grandchildren, they have supported about 60 children during their 18-year career as WSCC foster carers. 

‘I wasn't sure I wanted to begin fostering at the age of 50,’ recalls Sarah. ‘We had one teenager still at home, while the others had flown the coop, and part of me thought, “I’ve done my bit!” But fostering has been a hugely rewarding experience and has kept us closer as a family.’ 

‘Some of the girls who have been in our care came to the UK from Africa as unaccompanied minors and spoke little or no English. Yet they connect with our grandchildren immediately and it helps them settle. One of our granddaughters is seven and her school teacher has noted how she always looks out for children who cannot speak English well or are in need of a friend. Fostering brings out the best in all of us and makes us more empathetic.’ 

For some years, the Whites lived in central Africa, and that experience led to the family wanting to help others, particularly youngsters travelling from overseas. Graham said: ‘Some of the stories are heart-breaking. One girl came home from school in Africa one day and her whole family was gone. She lost contact with them and it took eight years to find her mother. That girl is now a nurse at a London hospital and is hoping to buy a home of her own.’ 

‘When people ask me why they should foster, I say, “Why not?” All you need is space in your heart and space in your home, and we’re fortunate to have both. I’m now in my 70s and don’t have the stamina to care for a four year old, but we have the emotional stamina to look after a teenager who may have endured a difficult childhood. Fostering covers a broad spectrum, from new-born babies to teenagers who have gone through difficult, even traumatic experiences in this country or oversees. It is challenging and not for everyone, but it has been a wonderful experience for us and our family and given us many happy memories.’ 

‘I met a lady only last week, about my age, and she told me that she went into foster care when she was 14. Her life had fallen apart, but her foster carers saved her life. We really do change lives, just by giving young people some support and a chance to flourish.’ 

WORDS: BEN MORRIS / PHOTOS: ALAN WRIGHT/JOHN LEWIS 

Further information: Visit www.fosteringwestsussex.org.uk